As a productivity and organization coach, I emphasize that the most important concept for being productive is CLARITY. What – exactly – am I going to do, how and when am I going to do it?
Since time is limited and the things we plan usually take longer to complete than we anticipate, setting PRIORITIES is critical, or we’ll never feel truly successful – there’s always something else we ‘should’ have accomplished.
Sometimes, the Big Picture is just too big! When we begin thinking about everything, it’s easy to feel anxious (and go into avoidance mode). But when we set aside planning time to decide our key goals and prioritize them, we gain direction and lessen anxiety. This also helps us to be more realistic about what can truly be accomplished in a given time period.
So ask yourself, “What are my PRIORITIES – for today (now), this week or next (soon), in the near future (later) or for now, (whenever).” Priorities change; some get moved up, some pushed back and others deleted, so a weekly Planning/Review Session is helpful. This can be with yourself, but also with your spouse or partner for family and home matters, or with your boss or staff for work-related issues.
Without clarity, which requires prioritization, we’re in that state of confusion or overwhelm that holds us back from doing anything completely or efficiently. With clarity, knowing our priorities, we can more easily put on those blinders to block out distractions, whether external or internal. (A good reason to keep your Parking Lot list handy, so when those distracting ideas, should-do’s, etc. pop up and potentially take you off-task, you can capture, but not get caught up by them.) This clarity drives action and increases productivity.
Once we know what to do, it’s important to decide how we’ll get it done. That’s where project management becomes critical to success. Project management may sound complicated and overkill, but it is a simple way to make it easier to get even fairly simple jobs done.
Many to-do’s, including some that at first glance seem easy, may require a multitude of specific tasks. They are actually projects, not tasks! Even something as seemingly uncomplicated as ‘Clean your room’ can leave some people confused or even overwhelmed, which makes it a job likely to be avoided. Breaking it down into steps and writing down those steps helps make the job more do-able. Leave a space for adding a checkmark as it gets done!. If you are giving chores to young children, use graphics in addition to words on the checklist. Verbally telling someone the items on a list is a recipe for failure, as is trying to remember every step. Most people, especially those with ADHD or Executive Function (EF) challenges, cannot retain much more than one or two steps in their short term memory.
Consider ‘Clean your room’ vs. having a checklist specifying: ‘Pick up any trash and discard it… Bring any dishes to the kitchen… Pick up your clothes and put the dirty ones in the hamper… Hang up or fold the clean ones… Put the comforter over your bed, etc. BTW, this is why many people get overwhelmed by the idea of decluttering; they lump everything together, making it totally challenging to do. We can only accomplish one task at a time, and the smaller, the better!
That’s whyproject planning is so critical to success (as much as we may dislike the specificity that planning entails!). One minute of planning can save as much as 20-40 minutes of action – or inaction. So unless we take the planning time to spell out each of the individual tasks the project requires (tasks being single-focused actions that can more easily be accomplished in a single time block), and in what sequence we’ll ‘attack’ those tasks, we risk feeling overwhelmed.
And what happens when we’re overwhelmed? On the neurological level, our protective amygdala perceives it as a threat, kicks in and takes over from our rational frontal lobes/executive function brain. Instead of tackling our project, we’re more likely to go into the ‘fight, flight or freeze’ response where avoidance rules. Not very helpful for getting things done!
So the more specific we are about what we are going to do and when we plan to do it (clarity and priority), the more likely that we’ll successfully accomplish our goal.
A simple example of how clarity makes a difference: “I want to go to the gym on Wednesday” vs. “I’m going to the 11:15 Intro to Pilates class, so I’ll have to leave at 10:45.” Which statement is more likely to produce results?
Don’t hide your clutter or feel guilty. Here are 11 reasons why it is so easy to accumulate clutter, and 13 ADHD-friendly rules that will help you to organize your home for good.
An ADDitude reader recently asked: “I’m 35 and a wife and mother to two boys. I was diagnosed with inattentive ADHD two years ago. I like to hold on to stuff — knick-knacks from my grandmother, a ticket stub from a play I saw with my husband five years ago, and so on. The only time I ‘sort of’ clean up and get organized is when I invite friends or relatives over for dinner. This doesn’t happen often these days, because I’ve run out of closet space and other hiding places for all the junk. Can you give me some hoarding help, so I can have my friends over again?”
Clutter-shame is a complaint of many adults with ADHD. There are lots of reasons we find it hard to let things go. Here are a few:
1. We have many interests and find it hard to set boundaries (on what we buy, what we keep, and where we put things).
2. It is easy for us to see possibility and potential, so we tend to hold on to things “just in case.”
3. We struggle with systems and getting things done, so it’s easy to wind up with stacks of mail or piles of laundry.
4. We keep things because they help us to remember an experience (tickets, programs, souvenirs).
5. We form emotional attachments, making it harder to let go of things (even if we dislike our aunt’s embroidered napkins or struggle to find space to store 200 drawings our children did in grade school).
6. We keep things visible because we might otherwise forget about them. We tend to “file by pile” because “out of sight is out of mind.”
7. We make impulsive purchases when shopping, because individuals with ADHD are usually in search of ways to stimulate their brains. Buying something new can create a rush of excitement, along with the temporary dopamine flow of contentment. We may fail to think clearly about how, or if, we’ll actually use the new item. This adds to clutter at home.
8. We have difficulty prioritizing and making decisions, so we just find it easier to keep everything. As Barbara Hemphill says, “clutter is postponed decisions.”
9. We get distracted and leave things where they were as we move on to something else, whether it is a kitchen counter with the remnants of last night’s dinner or a sofa with piles of magazines on the cushions.
10. We forget — or can’t find — what we have, so we buy extras.
11. Poor time management and lack of interest makes it challenging to follow routines, like emptying a dishwasher to avoid a sink full of dirty dishes or putting away clean laundry before it gets wrinkled.
The result? Our home becomes, and stays, a mess.
Having guests over is an excellent reason to get activated to straighten up. Unfortunately, the cleanup is usually done in a rush, and hiding items adds to the clutter in your hiding places. Use invitations to friends and family to incentivize the organizing process, then organize by following these strategies:
1. Tone down the emotion. We think, “I really have to straighten up” or “I need to declutter,” which seems overwhelming, and our ADHD brains react by going into the “fight, flight, or freeze” response. When there’s too much to do, we’re likely to avoid doing anything. Start by accepting that the smaller our task, the more likely we’ll get it done.
2. Understand the difference between a task and a project. Organizing a room — or even a closet — is a project. Breaking the job down into baby steps gives us do-able tasks. What are the specific areas that need to be organized? Think of each shelf, surface, or drawer as a separate space or task. Imagine each as a branch on a hybrid fruit tree. Each branch holds a slightly different fruit, and together they are part of the “room tree.” It’s easier to work on one branch then it is to prune the entire tree.
3. Imagine success. Think about how you will feel when you walk into a room that is organized to your satisfaction. Remember how great it feels to invite guests to your de-cluttered home. Think about what a good role model you’ll be for your children, how appreciative your family will be, and how you will feel as you make progress. Forecast this feeling of pride, calm, and comfort, rather than focusing on the stress and discomfort you will go through to achieve it. Think of the current situation as temporary. Accept the fact that things may get worse before they improve. As you organize, look for progress, not perfection; effort, not excellence. It’s better to promise yourself less and deliver more. Relax, breathe, and smile.
4. Create an ‘Organizing Plan.’ Decide on the areas you want to organize. Make a list of the projects (rooms, closets, etc.) and the specific tasks (spaces or things that need to be organized). Don’t worry yet about how you’ll organize — that can stop you before you start. Now decide which areas get priority. If you have difficulty prioritizing, think about where you’ll feel the greatest joy when it’s organized (or where you feel the greatest discomfort now).
5. Organization doesn’t just happen. There’s always something more interesting or urgent to do, so schedule organizing time on your calendar as Task-Appointments. Be specific as to which tasks you’ll work on. Unlike your Organizing Plan, which is a Master To-Do List, create an Action Plan for each organizing session, so that you are working toward realistic goals. Set a timer so you know when to stop (makes it easier to start and less likely to get overly hyper-focused). If you keep avoiding an organizing task, set your timer for 15 minutes (or less). Sometimes it’s just activating that’s the challenge, and it’s easier to get started when you know it’s only for a short time. (This is the strategy of my online accountability group – OvercomeOverwhelm.com)
6. Create a supportive vibe. This is not an easy process for you, so stop thinking it should be. That’s a trap. Take a walk outside before you begin working. Put on background music that will help keep you energized and focused. Make sure you have sufficient lighting. Stay hydrated and avoid hunger. If you take meds for your ADHD, take them to help with focus and decision-making. Keep the mindset that what you are doing is a gift to yourself and your family.
7. Love it, use it, or lose it. Pick one shelf, one surface, or one drawer. Look at each thing there and ask, “Do I need this? Does it really need me?” Marie Kondo suggests asking yourself, “Does this spark joy in my heart?” Judith Kolberg, founder of the National Study Group on Chronic Disorganization (now called the Institute for Challenging Disorganization) encourages over-personalizing the elimination process, by asking if an item is a friend, acquaintance, or stranger. You keep your friends and get rid of strangers. You enjoy acquaintances for a while, then are happy to see them go.
8. Minimize the sense of loss. If an item is something others might use, either donate it or give it to a friend or family member who would appreciate and use the item. Think of this as blessing someone else with your stuff.
9. Take photographs, then discard, recycle, give away, or donate the object. You can use those photos, whether of memorabilia or art projects, to create photo books or a DVD that you can share with others.
10. Group like with like. As you go through various spaces, group similar items in one area, so you will get a feel for what you have. This makes it easier to decide what you want to keep. Group items by function — how things are used. The book on first aid goes with the first-aid supplies, not with books.
11. Everything needs a home. Decide where the items should live. You might store linens in a central closet, or, for more convenience, in the rooms where they’ll be used. Think in terms of prime real estate. Those items used the most frequently, or those you want to display, should live in your prime real estate. Store the less-used items farther away. The home should be big enough to accommodate the items without stuffing them in (generates a mess), and small enough so you don’t have extra space that could become a haven for clutter. Label everything you can – it’s easy to forget what goes where, and labeling also helps others to maintain your systems.
12. Say “enough.” Set boundaries by deciding (without looking at what you have), how many of a certain type of item you need. If you have limited space to display your goodies, be more selective. When the space is full, it’s time to stop. If you don’t love an item enough to give it priority, then it’s an item you can release. When we have too much, everything loses some of its value.
13. Don’t go it alone. Working with a friend, family member or coach provides moral support, a sense of focus, and an objective perspective (“20 vases on that display shelf makes it difficult to appreciate any of them”). Just having someone else present (your “body double,” a term coined by Linda Anderson) will help you to stay focused on decluttering. Let them hold up items that, if you touched them, might reinforce an emotional bond. Avoid working with anyone who has a “just throw it all out” mentality. Consider the value of investing in hiring a professional organizer. Look for one trained to work with chronic disorganization and ADHD through NAPO (National Association of Professional Organizers) or ICD (Institute for Challenging Disorganization).
Getting organized doesn’t have to be painful. You CAN do it! Let go of the guilt and commit to taking baby steps — every success breeds success. Celebrate even the small accomplishments. You’ll feel energized and terrific, and your home will reflect your new approach!
The deadline for filing taxes is fast approaching. Many people have difficulty getting their financial records in order (if they can even find them!). This can be especially painful for those with ADHD or executive function challenges.
Be realistic. What is the likelihood that you will have your personal taxes ready to post or postmark by April 15th? (April 17th in 2017.) If it is slim, or predicated on wishful thinking, file for an extension now, to avoid penalties for late filing (you’ll still have to pay taxes and interest, so the sooner you file, the better).
Avoid avoidance. It is possible to overcome major avoidance, which is what keeps many people from getting their taxes done on time. For some of us, just the idea of finding and gathering all of the information feels overwhelming. And when something is overwhelming, we’ll do anything to avoid dealing with it (including putting it off despite the financial consequences). So accept that tax prep is a necessary evil, and make it easier by treating it as a PROJECT – not a task. A project consists of many tasks, and you can only do one at a time!
Begin by breaking down this project into various steps (the individual tasks). Some of these are itemized below. The idea is to focus on a single task at a time, so you aren’t overloaded by everything that needs doing.
Don’t say ‘YES’ unless you can say ‘WHEN.’ After you’ve decided what tasks you’ll need to do in order to finish your Tax Prep Project, decide when you’ll do them. Enter each task on your calendar, as a Task-Appointment, which is an appointment with yourself to do a specific thing at a specific time. This dramatically increases the likelihood that you’ll actually work on the task. It is easier to wrap your head and energy around beginning a specific task (activate!) then it is to think about accomplishing the entire project.
And if a task looks like it will take too long to complete in one appointment (given your attention span and other obligations), just work on it for a set amount of time. If you do that, you’ll have met your goal (even if the task itself isn’t finished). By doing what you planned, you’ll feel successful, and so more likely continue with other Task-Appointments and complete the project. Success breeds success.
The following steps will apply to most people:
Task #1Gather Papers. Begin by gathering the many financial papers you probably have in several different places, and put them in one location, even if you use the proverbial shoebox to hold everything! Don’t review them; don’t think about them. Just collect.
Task #2Sort into Categories. Sort the various papers you’ve gathered into categories (receipts, statements, tax reporting forms). Put them in separate folders (paper or poly project files) or just stack the papers, writing the category name on a blank paper kept on top of the pile. If you do your banking/investing/accounting by computer, set up a folder for the tax year, and include all relevant downloads.
Task #3Group your Deductions. If you itemize, group your family’s deductible receipts (medical, charitable contributions, childcare, education, business expenses, etc.). Note: You can request an annual statement from your local or mail order pharmacy that itemizes all medication expenses, so you don’t need to worry about keeping each receipt during the year. Obtaining this statement can be a separate Task (visit the pharmacy… make the call… or download the pharmacy record).
Task #4Review Banking Documents. Go through your checkbooks, bank and credit card statements for possible deductible expenses. Note: If you are reimbursed for a medical expense, it is not a deduction.
Task #5Determine if Anything is Missing. Are any reporting forms missing? (W2 or 1099’s, property or school taxes, mortgage interest, bank interest, investment records, stock dividends, etc.) You should have a list of what to look for from your accountant or tax preparer (many will send you a tax preparation document that you can just fill in with your information). If not, several are available online or through the IRS or free (legitimate) tax prep websites. If any critical reporting forms are missing, set a Task to contact the originator for a copy. Do this early enough to get the information before the filing deadline! Note: Accountants may have different requirements as to what documentation they need to do your taxes, so check in advance.
Task #6Tally the Results. Go through each category, list the details (whether using paper or computer) and add up the totals.
Task #7Make your IRA Contributions before April 15th, if you intend to deduct them for the prior year.
Task #8Complete the actual Tax Return Forms. Having everything organized isn’t enough – now it’s time to complete the actual tax returns, and submit them before the tax deadline. You can complete the forms yourself, use legitimate online tax software, or give your prep work to your accountant or tax preparer.
Take your Tax Prep Project a baby step, or task, at a time, and it will be easier to complete it without getting into a state of overwhelm or frustration. Hopefully you can do this in time to file by the due date, but if not, by or before the extension deadline.
Don’t ignore them – taxes DON’T just go away! Worse, the amount you’ll owe will increase if you don’t file on time. As a coach and organizer who mostly works with clients who have ADHD or executive function challenges, I’ve seen SO many who didn’t file taxes, even though they had the money to pay them or didn’t even owe money. Some were in dire trouble with the IRS. All because of overwhelm and avoidance!
Prepare now for a stress free next year. If you want next year to be less stressful, set up a system now, instead of scrambling next March. Use the category folders (Task #2) to file the appropriate papers as you receive them, so you’ll only have one place to look when it’s tax prep time. Consider keeping everything in a convenient magazine holder or file tray on or near your desk (the less effort you have to put into filing, the more likely you’ll be to do it). Some people prefer to scan each paper as it comes it in, so they don’t have to worry about storing/sorting papers.
If organizing for tax preparation is a challenge, work with someone to set up a simple system for managing your financial papers. It is worth the investment to hire a professional, given the possible penalties and interest due to late filings, the potential savings from having a clear record of all deductible items and from spending less time (and money) with your accountant and, perhaps most important, the reduced stress and improved comfort level you’ll experience. Find a local organizer who specializes in these systems at the National Association of Professional Organizers, www.napo.net or the American Association of Daily Money Managers, http://www.aadmm.com/findDMM.php.
Change the internal filter you use to view a situation and the results can be staggering!
Words are powerful – whether you say them out loud or just think them. They reflect how we perceive a situation, a person or ourselves. They can reinforce the positive, but all too often they give power to the negative. When we change our perception – what we think we see – our dialog changes. These new thoughts, and the accompanying words, can move us forward, instead of keeping us trapped.
When my son was about 9, he was in a crowded restaurant, sitting at a table with several adults. Running about the restaurant and disturbing the patrons was a very young girl. One of the adults described her as hyperactive, and the others agreed. But not my son, who said, She’s not hyperactive, she’s just actively exploring the world. Whoa…
Here’s a little girl who could grow up thinking of herself as having a problem, as being different in a negative way. Or she could grow up believing herself to be a curious explorer, destined to discover new things and truly observe the world around her. Think of her parents, who could either see her as a challenge or see her potential and help her to positively channel her energy.
In coaching we call this process of looking at things from a different perspective ‘reframing’. When you change the frame, the picture looks different.
Take the trait of impulsivity, which is often considered negative (and can sometimes lead to dire situations). However, without it there would be little creativity, which is often the flip side of spontaneity. Impulsivity can be a strength, leading to new ideas, and to taking risks on new businesses and new experiences. How dull life would be without it! Instead of perceiving impulsivity as negative, try looking at it from its potential, and help to positively channel that creativity and willingness to take risks.
When Thomas A Edison was young, he was sent home from school with a note. His mother told him it said, “Your son is a genius.” This school is too small for him and doesn’t have teachers who are good enough to train him. Please teach him yourself. Many years later he found the actual note, which said, “Your son is mentally deficient. We cannot let him attend our school anymore. He is expelled.” He wrote in his diary, “Thomas A Edison was a mentally deficient child whose mother turned him into the genius of the century.”
I don’t know whether that story is true, although I do know he was expelled from school (and that he also blew up part of his home doing experiments, and most likely had ADHD). His mother chose to interpret the school note from a different perspective, and look at the difference that made! She chose words that changed her son’s self-perception. What would his future have been if he thought his teachers considered him ‘deficient’?
So the next time you are tempted to criticize someone – OR YOURSELF! – try to reframe what you are thinking from a positive, supportive perspective. Words can change the future! 🙂
I would love to hear your thoughts on this! – Share your ideas blow.
Please feel free to share this article, with the following attribution: Written by Susan Lasky, Productivity, ADD/ADHD, Career & Organization Coach. Susan Lasky Productivity Solutions, www.SusanLasky.com. Used with permission.
Most of us feel overwhelmed by the many important, but not always urgent, tasks and projects that we need/want/have to or should do. We’re frustrated and stressed by our failure to get it all done.
What gets in the way? It isn’t necessarily a lack of motivation that’s holding us back, but the challenges that come from a lack of time and/or clarity:
What to do – conflicting priorities because there are just too many options
When to do it – lack of time to do it all (we’re not always realistic about our time and energy!)
How to get it done – confusion about how to accomplish a task or project
Other action-stoppers include:
Procrastination, due to the lack of a pressing deadline or consequence
Avoidance of tasks that are particularly difficult or boring
Inability to activate, or just get started (begin stuck in the ‘off’ position)
Time blindness that leads to poor planning – it’s either now, or not now
So, How DO We Get Anything Done? Many people, especially those with ADHD, are ‘burst workers.’ It takes us so long to activate, that when we finally get going on something, we want to get all of the mileage we can. So we wait until the last minute then shift into hyperfocus mode, then get so caught up in what we’re doing that it’s hard to stop. It helps when there’s a deadline, as there are no longer conflicting priorities, and the adrenaline (think stimulant) is naturally flowing, helping with concentration.
But what if there isn’t a deadline? What if it is a project that’s important, but not urgent?
Start by Making the Project Do-Able… and Avoid Overwhelm Projects can be complicated, and often involve many steps that can take a lot of time to complete. Just thinking about a project (instead of an individual task) can lead to feeling overwhelmed. Our protective brain perceives overwhelm as a threat, triggering the ‘fight, flight or freeze’ response. So instead of the increased clarity and focus we need to get things accomplished, we’re more likely to escape into avoidance mode.
The only way a project becomes do-able is when it’s broken down into tasks (individual components). Tasks allow you to focus on doing just one thing at a time. Yet sometimes, accomplishing even a single task can be challenging.
Think about it: How do you eat an elephant? Bite-by-bite. How does Pac-Man win? Byte-by-byte. How do you tackle a project, bit by bit, step-by-step or task-by-task!
Enter the Tortoise Approach… Slow and Steady Wins the Race
How to Overcome Avoidance, and Cross the Finish Line (Get it Done!) Start by choosing one very specific task (or mini-project) that will help you accomplish your project or long-term goal.
If your project is to send out weekly blogs, your task is to write one blog
If your project is to declutter your office, your task is to organize your desktop.
If your project is to find a new job, your task is to update your resume.
You can put the task on your calendar as a Task-Appointment (an appointment with yourself to accomplish a specific task at a specific time).
But putting it on the calendar doesn’t mean you’ll get it done.
We’re most likely to complete things when there’s a looming deadline with consequences, when it’s a task we really enjoy, or if we’re trying to avoid something that’s even less appealing! Otherwise, so many things can get in the way, and we wind up with a large number of important tasks that we never seem to get around to completing.
So make the task more do-able by making it even smaller:
Instead of writing a blog, jot down your ideas for the blog.
Instead of organizing your desktop, clear the space around your keyboard.
Instead of updating your resume, make a list of your job responsibilities.
The smaller the task, the more likely you’ll be to do it – especially if you’ve assigned a time to work on it.
Slow down and limit the amount of time you work on the task (so you’re more willing to do it!)
These are the tasks that you haven’t been able to accomplish burst-working, so try a different approach – don’t try to get it all done in a day. Think progress, not immediate completion. (Also, be wary of perfection, which is often the enemy of progress).
Assign just 20 minutes to the task, or if that seems like too much effort, go for 15 minutes… or even 10.
The goal is tomake your task-time short enough that you’ll actually get to it. You can do almost anything for 10 minutes! Don’t worry about finishing the task (unless you are on a deadline). The way you’ll finish is with consistent effort.
Shoot for the minimum time and set a timer to keep you honest! If you’re on a roll and want to work longer, it’s okay to keep the momentum going if there’s nothing else you have scheduled. If you are still having a hard time getting started on the task, use a timer that shows the remaining minutes disappearing – so the end is actually in sight!
Like the tortoise, keep plodding onward. Studies show that authors complete more books when they write for ten minutes a day than when they wait for the time and inspiration to do burst-writing sessions. Commit to working on your task, or other parts of the project, on a regular basis (every day, four times a week, or whatever makes sense for you).
Even if you absolutely don’t feel like it, or you’ve been swamped by other, more pressing tasks, by carving out these short but regular sessions to work on tasks related to that important, but neglected project,you will get it done!
Susan Lasky Productivity, ADD/ADHD & Organization Coach at Susan Lasky Productivity Solutions
Susan Lasky helps people who are overworked, overwhelmed or disorganized to get things done by working with the way they think. For more than 25 years she’s helped them find the right tools and strategies to better manage their time, priorities, paperwork, projects, space and stuff, so they gain more time, energy and focus to grow their business, succeed in school or the workplace, balance work/home/self-care and truly live a life they love!
Susan is a Board Certified Coach, Senior Certified ADHD Coach, Edge-Certified Student Coach and Level II Specialist in Chronic Disorganization, as well as a trained Organizer-Coach and Office Productivity & Systems Consultant, certified Career & Life Planning Specialist, Holistic Time Mastery Coach, and a Golden Circle member of NAPO, National Association of Productivity and Organizing Professionals.
